My Name is Kate and I’m an Addict @DaytonMomsBlog

photo credit: Iker Merodio | Photography Welcome, Martin (the Beginning) via photopin (license)

If you have been following any part of our adoption journey, you may know we have a good relationship with Max’s birth mom, Mommy Kate. We have the opportunity to celebrate birthdays, Christmas and other occasions together.

A little over a year and a half ago Cheryl wrote about our relationship with Mommy Kate in the blog post Her Name is Kate. You can see the original post on Dayton Moms Blog, where many have had the opportunity to read a little about her journey.

Today, Kate reveals a little more about her story in post called My Name is Kate and I’m an Addict. She recounts the days leading up to Max’s birth and some of what transpired afterwards.

Here’s a portion of her story:

My Addiction was at 110% and I was drowning in it.

The days after that court hearing, where my son took on the name of another family were so difficult. I continued the cycle of using and jail and hating who I had become. I ended up in jail one last time and then entered a rehab center (again). While trying to get myself healthy, the love of my life died of a drug overdose. I knew then and there that I needed to change or I would not make it. At his funeral services, I saw my son again. The adoptive parents came to pay their respects to their son’s birth father, and it touched me that they came and I got to take him around and introduce him to the family. I knew that I was going to be different, I wanted to stop drowning in my addiction.

Take a few minutes to read what Mommy Kate shares. Our lives are forever changed through her and Max.

The Alternate Route

Trust the Process.  It’s a phrase you hear that applies to a number of situations.  It is also an apt description of the latest blog post from my daughter.

She is a senior in college and graduation is not far away.  In her post she shares about the struggle of just getting the grade in the class versus learning the content to be prepared for the job market and life.

She writes this near the beginning of the post:

I go to my first week of classes and listen to my professors say what I need to do to succeed in their courses.  They go over the syllabus and they talk about these things called the “course objectives.”  I almost always skip over this portion of the conversation and of this part of the syllabus, heading straight for the grading criteria, but in one of my classes a few weeks ago I really listened.  The course objectives aren’t what we are going to be doing in the class or what it takes to get an “A” but instead they are written to be a list concepts, skills, and applications that we will learn in the class.  Ohhhhhhh okay, learning.  That’s that old thing that they used to say school was all about.

Read the rest of her post and how she applies this idea to our walk with God.  Are we on this journey just to get the grade or are we trusting the process that will grow and shape us into the person God created us to be?

Read the whole post here:  The alternate route

A Must Read: A Letter to My Step-Daughter @DaytonMomsBlog

I’m a little late in sharing this (it was published last Friday), but it is still worth a read. My wife has another post on the Dayton Moms Blog and it gives a little peek into our journey of being a blended family.

Before we added to our family through adoption, we took on the challenge of blending a family of three boys and one girl spaced out from elementary school through a new high school graduate. Like most families, this was new territory for us and we faced a few challenges. Cheryl writes about that in her post.

I joked with her that her post makes me sound smarter than I really am, but I loved her honesty in this particular paragraph:

He told me to be patient and that was so hard. I wanted an instant family, I wanted you to just fit right into our family with my kids, and that was so selfish of me. Being patient was hard, but oh the wonderful things I was able to see and observe in that time. I watched you grow and mature from a distance.

Take a few minutes to read the letter on the Dayton Moms Blog.  Hopefully it will be an encouragement to you or allow you to encourage someone else facing a similar journey.

Cheryl Shares Our Adoption Journey // @DaytonMomsBlob

Cheryl is back on the Dayton Moms Blog this week and shares some of our adoption journey.

This month we celebrated World Adoption Day and the month of November is National Adoption Month.

You can read what she wrote on Dayton Moms Blog.

Experiencing Generosity on our Adoption Journey

I shared last week that we are back on the road to adoption.  Eli will be one month tomorrow and we are moving forward with the different steps that lead to finalizing the adoption.

As we have relaunched this journey, we have been reminded that we are not doing it alone.  While we knew that was true, people have expressed love and support in a number of ways.

While I enjoy blogging, I recognize I don’t have a huge audience that frequent my posts.  However, what I shared last week brought about a huge jump in visitors.  I know that is because so many have a heart for adoption and shared our adoption story.

We also saw contributions to our Brackemyre Family Adoption Page. It is a humbling experience when people give from their own resources to support what we have decided to do.  We are nearing 50% of our goal on our page and had a couple of unexpected gifts come in the last week.  With that has been given, we have been able to stay current with our attorneys and other home study needs.

If you are one who gave on our page or shared it or read our story, THANK YOU!

As we continue down the road to adoption, we’d love for you to join us in one of three ways:

1) Visit our AdoptTogether page to read a little more of our story

2) Share our AdoptTogether page with those in your circles of influence. Perhaps there is someone you know who has a heart for adoption.

3) If you are able, you can give through AdoptTogether toward adoption expenses.

We have had people give us diapers and outfits, provide meals and stop in “just to see the baby.”  We are truly grateful and look forward to the next few miles on our adoption journey.

Back on the Road to Adoption

Many months ago I posted about our bump on the road to adoption. We had made connections with a birth mom and were preparing to welcome a new child into our home. Birth mom decided to parent and our journey toward adoption seemed to stall. We had a number of people who had given toward adoption expenses through our AdoptTogether page.

Then last month – enter Eli.

Through a friend of a friend we were connected with a birth mother who was due early July. She decided to pursue adoption with us. We made plans to meet her on a Monday – two weeks before her scheduled C-section. As it turns out, Eli made an early entrance on the next day. Eli spent several days in the hospital and we were communicating with our attorney to get all appropriate paperwork in place so we could gain custody. A week after his birth, we brought Eli home.

Due to the money already given through our AdoptTogether and another grant we received, we were able to cover some of the initial expenses. There are still other expenses associated with adoption, including some due to this being an interstate adoption. We are adopting a Hoosier!

There are at least three things you can do if you feel lead to help with our adoption.

1) Visit our AdoptTogether page to read a little more of our story

2) Share our AdoptTogether page with those in your circles of influence. Perhaps there is someone you know who has a heart for adoption.

3) If you are able, you can give through AdoptTogether toward adoption expenses. While there are many worthy causes and many other families pursuing adoption, we’d love any support people feel led to give.

In our experience, adoption has been a period of waiting and more waiting followed by a flurry of activity to bring a child home.  Thanks for taking the time to read about and even be a part of our adoption journey.

A Bump on the Road toward Adoption

My wife and I have been sharing the last few weeks about our plans to adopt again. We’ve shared our AdoptTogether page and have been blessed by numerous people who have given toward our adoption related expenses. Through a friend in Maryland we had connected with a birth mother who is due in June and were making plans to welcome a little boy into our family. As happens at times with adoption, we have hit a bump in the road. Birth mother has decided to parent.

This is part of the update that Cheryl put on our AdoptTogether page.

As I write, we have learned that our birth momma in Maryland has decided to parent, we continue to pray for her and that precious baby boy. When our adoption failed in 2013, we grieved, much like what we are doing now, but remember how God used that situation to prepare us for Max. We know that God is up to something even better than we could have ever imagined. He simply wants us to trust HIM though this journey. So we wait for the child that God wants to add to our family, and we trust HIS plan through the grief. We will update you as we know more, thanks for walking with our family thought this roller coaster and prayers are appreciated (I, Cheryl, hate roller coasters!).

We know that adoption is not always a smooth road and we were as prepared as we could be for any change of direction that might take place. We learned through adopting our son Max that God sees further and farther than we do, so we continue to trust Him. We have been so encouraged by those who have supported us financially and through their prayer and personal support.

Just a week or so ago I was listening to a podcast and the speaker was talking about worry. This is not a totally accurate quote, but carries what he said in his message: What God originates He orchestrates. So, we continue to trust Him as we continue down the road.

Adoption Fundraising Continues & We Are So Grateful

A couple of weeks ago I posted about our Adopt Together fundraising page. We also had a friend send out some letters on our behalf to help with our efforts. We also have a former student of mine who is doing a Thirty-One party for us. Through it all Cheryl and I have been humbled by those who have joined us in this next stage of our lives. We have received gifts from family, friends, a few “back in the day” friends and even some people who have joined us anonymously. Currently we are nearly 50% of the way toward our goal. Again, we are so grateful for those who have decided to partner with us.

Currently, we have received enough to pay for the renewal of our home study, to send the necessary fees to our attorney in Ohio and our attorney in Maryland. We had no idea what the response would be and we are blown away.

We are using the website Adopt Together and are so appreciative of that form of communication and safe place for people to give. This video gives a little bit of the back story of Adopt Together.

AdoptTogether “Meet The Family” from AdoptTogether on Vimeo.

For those who want to be a part of this, there are two ways you can be involved.

1.) Our Adopt Together Page. Again, Adopt Together is a non-profit group and they provide grants to families who want to adopt. The gifts that are given are tax-deductible. You can click on the image below to go to our page.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2). Our Thirty-One Event. If you like Thirty-One products or want to buy something as a gift, check out the party This one closes on April 20 so it is concluding in just a few days. Click the image to go there.

 

 

 

 

 

We are again so thankful for those who are a part of this adoption journey.

3 Questions for the School Year

We kicked off another year of small groups Sunday night. I love the excitement and anticipation a new school year brings. It’s a new start and a time for groups that met last year to get back into the routine of meeting again. It’s also a time to welcome new students into small groups and help them connect with each other.

One bonus this year is that we have some new leaders in our groups. We have two of our young adult/college age guys that are helping with two groups. We also have two high school senior girls who will be co-leading a girls group.

As we begin a new season, we are striving to keep three questions out in front of our students. We want these questions to be a continual reminder to our students (and adults) that we all need to see where we need to make progress in our spiritual journey. The three questions will hopefully be a source of challenge when we need that kick-start or need to get back on track.

1) How are your growing? We want to help our students to take steps where they are growing on their own, outside of the church or small group environment. Are they reading the Bible on their own and spending time in prayer?

2) Where are your serving? Our desire is for our students to be an active part of our church family, not just showing up and being present, but serving in some area of ministry.

3) Who are you reaching? Everyone has influence on someone else. We want to encourage our students to use their influence in the lives of others to point them to Jesus.

The school year is underway and we don’t know what the coming months may bring. We can strive to grow, serve and reach. Here’s to a great school year!